Is It Backlash of Baby Envy

I’m wondering if I am receiving the backlash from Younger Boy’s Baby Envy. I believe it was three weeks ago that Jane told my fiancé that Younger Boy had Baby Envy and wanted to be held anytime that she picked up her baby. I can’t remember what else he may have exhibited, but it occurred to me that was also around the time that this horrid phase of his (needing permission to do things, needing attention all the time suddenly) started up out of no where.

The boys spent time with Jane this last Sunday and we were told that Younger Boy acted out in the restaurant they went to. He was yelling or something like that. At the time I kind of just rolled my eyes and muttered an “I dare him to try that with us” to my fiancé. But now with my new theory I see it as possibly Younger Boy trying to get attention from Jane.

This new theory occurred today at the doctor’s office. I’ve been having some issues with what feels like my blood sugar being all funky. Anyway, Younger Boy is generally really well behaved when we go out. I even let him bring along some of his toy trains. But this time he was blood-pressure rising, you’re lucky we’re not at home and that you’re father isn’t here misbehaving. He pulled out every attention getting gimmick he knows. He dropped his trains and repeated that he did over and over. He forced his faux coughs and sneezes. He even did his “I have to go potty” over and over, even though he didn’t have to go. He even dared try to throw a crying fit which was quickly ended and rethought with a really good glare from me.

If this had been the first time he’d ever been to an appointment with me, I’d possibly write it off as toddler boredom. But he’s been to quite a few appointments with me and he’s been oh so well behaved. Combined with his recent phases, I really think that it’s the “pay attention to me” thing going on. Since he’s three I really can’t get too much detail from him when I’ve tried to see if he’ll tell me anything.

Considering I’ve never raised kids with babies before I can’t really say that I’ve seen what this looks like. I have, however, been the older sister with a younger baby in the house. But from what I remember, she was always my baby and as we got older I, being Little Miss Bossy, ran the roost. My fiancé is the youngest of his siblings, but he didn’t’ have any babies underneath him. Much less neither of us have been children of divorce.

I’ve been wondering if her having a baby that gets to live with her while they don’t would start to play a factor. I also wonder when and if it’s going to click or matter to the older boys.

In the mean time, do any of you have experience with this and or advice on how to handle it? I’ve started a behavior modification chart with Younger Boy since the potty training chart worked so well. But it’s more geared to him eating his meals and being nice to his brothers. I didn’t want to load up on trying to fix too many behaviors at once.

Trust me when I say that my patience is on thin ice. I've been ignoring, ignoring and ignoring. But oh my gosh am I ever so tired of it at this point. There has to be something that will work, right?