I mentioned a while ago that before I came into their lives all four of my boys (including FH) were ruled by video games. There were Nintendo DSs, a Wii, a Playstation 2, a regular old school Nintendo … I’m pretty sure that’s it.
I’ve worked pretty hard to try and encourage more playtime, outside playtime, creative playtime, reading and anything that doesn’t involve the TV or video games. It makes me sad sometimes, and a bit astounded, how easily a TV turned on can suck the boys in. I’ve noticed it’s mainly Older Boy and Middle Boy though. Younger Boy isn’t as easily pulled into a turned on TV as his older brothers are. I like to think that my influence has something to do with it.
It won’t even be anything intriguing. It could be a commercial or one of Younger Boy’s little kid shows. If the TV is on I can guarantee that Older Boy or Middle Boy will stop whatever it is their doing and will be staring at it, mouth slightly open, and all thoughts of whatever it was they were supposed to be doing are gone.
Back on topic, I’m fully aware that when the boys go over to Jane’s all they do is watch TV and play video games until all hours of the night. That’s why every time we pick them up they're exhausted and falling asleep. Any overnight adventure at Jane’s will surely result in a long nap the next day. It’s irritating, but what can you do?
FH told me that he had a conversation today with Older Boy.
The jist of it was that FH told Older Boy that he doesn’t mind that he plays video games over there since he doesn’t get a lot of time to play over here. (My sidethought is that I don’t mind the fact that they want to play video games. It’s just I wish they’d learn some self control when it comes to playing them.) Anyway, Older Boy told FH that he’s getting bored playing them because he’s played them so much. It’s a step forward, right? At least until Jane brings home a new video game for them?
Maybe next time they go over I’ll suggest to Older Boy to maybe bring a book and his drawing pad. In case he wants to read or draw.
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7 comments:
Have you thought about getting a Wii? It keeps them up and moving, it's a great family activity, and the perfect amount of not-too-strenuous exercise for preggers :)
Yeah, we do have a Wii. It's one of the systems I actually don't mind. We do "Just Dance" "Wii Fit" and Wii Fit Plus" And oh yes! It is definitely one of my favorite forms of exercise as a preggo lady. It's been pretty warm lately so I'd rather stay inside than go outside during the afternoons to get my body moving.
They do eventually grow out of it/get bored.
It almost sounds as if FH thinks you are in the wrong to not let them be ruled by video games...is he resentful? Or did I read it wrong?
I have a similar scenario. I dislike TV, video games, and computer use for more than a combined hour each day , or the equivalent couple of hours every couple of days, so you can fit in a really satisfying gaming session, or a movie, or save your hours up for TV marathon.
Before me, my husband used to spend most of his leisure-time hours plus some on the computer, and the kids could spend up to six hours per weekend day around the computer either having their turns or watching the other kids have their turns. TV use was common, but no consoles. My understanding is that at their mother’s house the TV is constantly on, and that they can use the computer and console as they like (although kids are not necessarily reliable when reporting this kind of thing to the other parent).
Now that I live in the home, computer and TV use has reduced drastically, and my husband has been actively supportive of the change. He will send the kids away from the computer if he notices they've been at it for too long, although he still uses the computer himself more than I like. The kids have a rule of one hour of computer each per Friday, Saturday or Sunday. On rainy days or days we need a break, we give them extra time, and on days that are full of other activities, they might not get a turn at all.
I have noticed that on the days where we have nothing on in the morning and they spend their mornings around the PC, the instant the PC goes off I can get the attitude: 'I'm bored, can I turn on the TV' (it kicks in like auto-pilot, when one screen goes off they seek out the next screen). Whereas on a day where we go out in the morning, they are far more likely to get engaged with helping prepare meals or colouring in or lego and not ask for the TV or computer. I’m thankful that our finances prohibit the purchase of a console, although I am tempted by Wii Fit. I am also aware that having only one computer and one TV to share makes controlling screen time easier, and hopefully we can continue that in future despite the lure of convenience.
@ atouchofthecrazy, sometimes kids will use the computer until they are impaired for normal social interaction (from tiredness, or because they are so used to being served entertainment on a platter they have not got the patience), or until they believe they are incapable of entertaining themselves and require a screen in order to get satisfaction. I actually don’t believe every kid will grow out of it or get bored, especially not if screen use is the only thing they have been modeled or the only thing they have experienced. I think we need to demonstrate to our kids what life is like without a screen to entertain them, make them experience it, so that they *will* grow out of it/get bored because they understand there is a different way to live.
I have noticed that my step kids see their father model the use of leisure time for a) using the computer, b) playing board/card games, or c) reading, and that this is largely how they have structured their own leisure time, in that order. I find it frustrating that he does not model to them using leisure time for more productive, constructive things like home maintenance or gardening or learning new skills that aren’t computer-based (like my father did for me), but I guess that’s my role.
My boys are the same way! Not so much with video games because we don't have any but definitely with the TV. When they hear it go on they will drop whatever they were doing (even if they were busy doing something fun)to see whats on. Even when my husband turns on a political or news video on the computer they rush over to see what it is. Drives us crazy!
I have this same trouble. I have enforced a no TV zone in our house. All of the kids are behind grade level in school, there's no reason they should be watching TV. But at BMs? It's on all the time. No one she can't get them out of the door in the morning.
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