Thursday, July 29, 2010

He Has An Infection Where?

I like to think that considering I am the full-time at home parental figure in the boys lives I have a good grasp on what’s going on with them. But sometimes I find myself questioning my instincts when Jane makes statements about the boys’ health.

For the most part she’s full of hot air, but I think I second-guess myself because I still feel all new and shiny as a parent. Although I’ve come to understand that just because the woman has given birth to four children doesn’t make her an expert at motherhood either.

The latest incident happened last night. FH and I picked the boys up and FH informed me that Jane had informed him that Younger Boy has an infection on his penis.

Considering I was home with the child ALL DAY and didn’t notice anything different about his potty habits, nor did he complain to me about any burning or hurting when he went to the bathroom I was confused. I know Urinary Tract infections are not pleasant and would only assume that they’re not pleasant for the male folk either.

My gut told me that Younger Boy had told her that his penis hurt because that’s his latest new thing. “Penis” and “Butt” and randomly talking about them at great lengths is the latest trend in the world of Younger Boy. A couple of weeks ago while playing with Legos Younger Boy looked up at me and said:

YB: There are thorns in my penis.
Crys: *Silent with shock, then confusion, then I dared to respond with* Oh yeah? And how did thorns get in your penis.
YB: *Nonchalantly* There were thorns pushing on my penis. So now I run away from them.
Crys: Oh, OK. Well, good job then.

The child has also randomly yelled out while in the shower, his room, or while sitting on the toilet the following:

“Don’t step on my penis!”
“Ouch! That hurts my butt!”
“Don’t step on my butt!”
“Ouch! My penis hurts!”
“Ouch! My butt hurts!”

In which it is usually followed by a lot of laughter and then a repeat of the statement through the laughter.

Now, to the non-knowing person a statement like that could lead to many crazy thoughts. We’ve tried to talk to him about it … about not saying things like that unless it really does hurt…but he’s four-years-old. And apparently to this four-year-old boy it’s damn funny. So are the words “poop” and “fart.”

Back to the story, I informed FH that was my assumption. We even asked Younger Boy if his penis hurt and he said no.

At home we took a look and saw nothing unusual. Again, Younger Boy said that it didn’t hurt. And then he went to the bathroom without incident and took a shower. And this morning there has still been no complaint. And trust me, I’ve asked.

I guess I should be thankful that 1)The child does not have an infection and 2)Jane didn’t insist on rushing him to the emergency room as she likes to do for non-medical emergencies.

But it irritates me when I second-guess myself because of something she says.

4 comments:

Amy said...

Boys and body parts/functions.... it never gets better. Mine are grown and still think it's funny when they fart - but only around each other. NEVER around a girl so I guess there's hope for them. ;)

It just shows you how much better you know the boys than Jane does.

LuckyNo27 said...

I agree!

Giving birth to four children only makes you an expert in childbirth... you know it's motherhood that makes you an expert in motherhood.

(For the record, I am a 21-year-old female who still laughs at fart jokes and had a good laugh about "Don't step on my penis!")

dragonflymama said...

My Peanut is a four year old boy, and he also gets quite a kick out of body parts and function jokes. The thing that anyone knows who has spent any amount of time with a four year old is that their sense of consistancy is utterly nonexistent. Peanut will tell me yes one second and no one second later. He will say things like "I am hungry but I do NOT want to eat anything." Or "I really want to go to sleep but I am not tired at all." So far, with my boy anyway, unless there are tears, an obvious limp, or clear signs of pain, the child is perfectly fine. They just like to talk. And we, as the parents have to decipher what they actually mean.

You are doing great. Don't question yourself because of what she doesn't understand. You are the parent here, remember that.

Anonymous said...

YOU are the full-time parent here. Your instincts are leading you right. Take comfort in that.