I wanted to get some more thoughts down. FH gave me more information about Jane asking if Middle Boy could come live with her and it riled me up. I figured I’d sleep on it before regurgitating it.
I found out that Jane’s excuse for wanting Middle Boy is because “He is too emotionally unstable at our house.” Which was sort of true a year or two ago, but that child was emotionally unstable anyway. Do you really blame the poor child? His mother up and left, had a new child of his own, plus he was suddenly thrown into an environment where there were rules and expectations. Since then Middle Boy has really grown and blossomed into a fabulous young man. Don’t get me wrong, he still drives me up the wall now and then with his Middle Boy antics but he has come a really long way from where he was.
I also found out that Jane does not live in a 2 bedroom apartment as I originally thought. Jane and her man and their son (who will be 3 this year) live in a 1 bedroom apartment. I about blew my lid. I know we’ve squeezed all 5 of us into a two bedroom before but we upgraded to a 3 bedroom as soon as we got a handle on our new life together. And our new house that we’ll be renting is a 5 bedroom, with a large back yard. (That’s all in another post.)
Anyway, I don’t know what suddenly caused Jane to call us up and ask if she could have Middle Boy come lie with her. I don’t know if she’s hoping to get some form of child support, especially since we’ll still have two of the boys and she’s never gave us money or offered any financial support for the boys. The few times she has asked she’s told us how they have no money and could hardly pay rent or bills much less get their own food. I don’t know how she thinks she’s going to be able to support one more growing boy when she tells us this.
Middle Boy is definitely the mommy’s boy who looks forward to seeing her each week. The other two are kind of “eh, whatever. I get to go play video games all day and eat junk food” about it.
Sort of on topic, I also found out that Jane hasn’t said a word to FH about the incident that happened a couple of weeks ago (I first mentioned it in the last post). When he called her up to ask her if she thought it was a good idea to take the boys this week she seemed kind of surprised that he was asking such a question. If I didn’t know better I would assume she had no clue why FH was calling with such a question.
If you ask me it’s quite fishy. There’s usually some sort of motive behind anything Jane does, and it usually isn’t in favor of the boys’ best interest. But I’ll keep you updated on the happenings. As far as I can tell, and after talking with FH about it he’s going to tell her “No.”
7 comments:
It sure sounds like it's in MB's best interest to spend as little time in that undisciplined atmosphere as possible. Give him time and he'll probably grow out of the "it's fun to have no life but video games" stage
Oh Amy, I sure hope so. Older Boy grew out of it pretty quick. I'm hoping that Middle Boy will learn to enjoy some of our family outings more.
I think your husband is making the right decision
I think your husband should tell her no and that you will not entertain it further. Make her go to court and request it. I don't think any judge in his/her right mind would break up the boys, send him to live in a place where he doesn't even have a room to sleep in, with a person as financially and mentally unstable as Jane. I also don't think middle boy is old enough for the courts to consider his wants. He's just a child and doesn't know what's best.
Don't let this stress you out. I really don't think it will happen.
Selfish Stepmom, I think that is a really good idea in telling Jane if she wants to do any further action she can bring it to court. Thanks for the suggestion!
Yup, the court suggestion. That seems the wisest way to go. Any updates?
Hope everything is well...
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